A Newsletter.

I’m going to start AND finish with the shameless self promotion, because, as previously discussed, I intend to be shameless. Besides, it’s VERY IMPORTANT. But in the middle there will be cultural stuff and also personal stuff. This is a Newsletter, so I will speak briefly, as a place-holder, because part of why I’ve been away is that I want to give each of these things proper attention, so there are many drafts, and rehearsals, and just…look, I’m not fast enough for the news cycle or my own news cycle. There’s a lot happening. Here’s the overview.

The Folium Diaries

Oh, hey! A job! I’m composing the music for a new dramatic podcast, The Folium Diaries! I also play a character on the show (Jane), and I have to say…this is a pretty great show! It’s also very short (less than ten minutes most episodes), so it’s easy to binge. Learn more and listen to the show here.https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-folium-diary/id1838846886

Season one is out now, and coming season two, you’ll be hearing a lot of music composed by me, as well as takes on old favorites (currently working on an eerie banjo version of Daisy Bell)

My First Live Show Since Moving to the Sticks–and Subscribers get access!

I will be playing a death-defying three hour gig (or at least it will feel that way) at Mario’s Marina Bar on Saturday, January 17th. There will be video. I have vowed to myself I will post it even if I hate the show. I’m not doing live stream, because mostly the internet is great, but sometimes, it’s not, and I just don’t want to risk it. But I will be playing live, so really. Who cares?

But you SHOULD care about getting the video! I predict it will be a big show, whether I like it or not, because I am new in town, and strange, and the people have taken an interest, and this is supposedly what I do, and I’m just expecting there to be a crowd. For most shows, I expect precisely nobody. But people show up to community events here. But here’s the thing: They GO. But they aren’t any nicer about it than people in cities. If they go to see Tommy’s stand-up show, and Tommy sucks, they say, “Wow, that Tommy really sucks!” They might even say it to Tommy’s face. “Well, Tommy, you really blew chunks tonight. Try and be better next time.” Because they’ll probably go to next time, too.

And I very much so respect that. But I’m really putting in the effort. People: I bought a DRESS.

This is something I’ve never done for any show. But…honestly, I chalk this up to “I’m an adult, now.” And by that I mean…When I was still trying to figure out, well, EVERYTHING, I absolutely RESENTED the fashion aspect of music. Because I was trying to figure out the music bit, and the fashion just seemed like, “Not my job,” even though there was no one else to do the job. Fine, I’d look like the hobo I was. It was the music that mattered, and that would be it’s own statement.

So, in some ways it was just a sacrifice I made as an independent artist who has to do it all, and simply can’t. But I chose fashion to sacrifice because I was very scared of it. I am quite confident in words and speaking and music and sound. I am far less confident in any visual art.

My work on NiteFlirt as a remote dominatrix is where I practice all of the skills that “I am not good at.” I didn’t plan it this way, but that’s how it is. I guess because it isn’t “me.” Marla believes in getting paid for her time and attention. I believe I can make do with nothing. Marla is a model and photographer. Marla’s favorite art is great advertising. Marla rarely cams because it has to look beautiful. Whereas I frequently wear my clothes to bed, wake up, and then wear them again the next day.

But then one day you wake up and go, “Oh, I guess I have put in a considerable amount of hours contemplating clothing and aesthetics. Pretend you’re Marla, who is an expert in such things, and what markets someone well.”

And she came up with this:

The jacket may also be a different leather jacket, or possibly a velvet jacket. I have to wait for my shipment from ThredUp before I will know. But the point is, I thought about the whole fucking thing. Like someone who knows what they’re doing.

(The dress, jacket and purse are from ThredUp, the tights are from Amazon (boo), and the shoes I’ve had for a number of years.)

Anyway. Fashion has always given me a fear of commitment. It’s quite reductive and immediate in its impression. And I come on strong, anyway. Do I really have to say it with fashion when I’m about to bellow it with my voice?

Yes. And so I chose an outfit that suggests I’m eclectic and tough and loud and thrifty, but I’m wearing silk (just so you know I’m in charge), and I’m probably about to bellow something with my voice.

Bada-Bing, Bada-Boom: A statement has been made.

So, there. I can put my clothes on. It’s not that hard, it turns out. Just, you know, pick something and commit.

But the last thing I want to do is look like a big deal and then suck eggs. So I’m also practicing like mad. I really want to make this a show to remember.

Become a subscriber to get “Samantha Church LIVE at Mario’s” mailed to your inbox. Go to the top right of the screen and click “Subscribe.”

It’s a thing that will make you feel good inside. Just go ahead. Go on. Subscribe.

PTV Games on NiteFlirt.

Whenever I think about how sex “workers” (artists) are unfairly maligned as “not working,” I think of the PTV game. Which is, just, like, a bespoke treasure that no one deserves.

I’ve been working on this PTV game for two fucking weeks. I had to do a photo and video shoot, I had to edit them into gifs, I had to arrange them in an order, and create written text and audio for each one, that builds tension as they go. And this is part of a series, so I of course had to lay them all out and think about the course of the entire year. They are an entire fucking production. I mean…it’s just a whole lot of work, that requires a lot of know-how in a lot of areas, and without a second set of hands. For God’s sake, show some fucking RESPECT to adult content creators and just pay the lady.

Anyway, it’s gonna be good. Now that I’ve restarted on NiteFlirt, I’ve been thinking about how I want to do things differently. I want to put a lot more focus on quality and a lot less on quantity. Every rule in the book says be consistent and available, but no. Every rule in a woman’s book says that is precisely the opposite of what you do to be desirable. And I feel that the culture as dictated by the tech overlords is designed to put women at a disadvantage–the rules of content creation being chief among them. An oversaturated market is part of how they take away our leverage. A demand to be on all the times is how they make people believe they must behave.

So fuck the rules of content creation. These fuckers will wait for me, and when I tell them I’m ready, they will know why they waited. And it’s as simple as that.

I am breaking down my work for advertising content in such a way that I will have the NF feed going all year long. I’m not throwing away content, anymore. No more churn and burn, ever. Every piece of content must be wrung for every scrap of life that it has. So the goal is to positively FILL it with life.

Quality not quantity. I will have respect for what I do, regardless of the culture. This will be true about all work, commercial, artistic, erotic or tame.

Which isn’t to say that my output is anything less than vast. You haven’t heard from me in a while because I’m working on: 3 hours of live performanc. 46 webpages that will comprise this full PTV game (and which I’m breaking into sections because I must in order to live), which are comprised of 46 GIF’s, 46 audios, and 46 pieces of text, all of which are created, edited and distributed by me), the advertising that goes with these pieces, the music from Folium–all of this before June–

I can promise you will get everything you need from me. But you will not get everything all of the time and all at once. I will not compete on saturation or even attempt to, anymore. Nor will I feel guilty about a lack of trying to compete: I will compete on quality, and that is all.

No more Archive. Just the subscription. Which will include access to the archive.

This is basically about me trying to get off of PayPal. Though, Stripe also has its Thiel connections, so I don’t know if it’s much better. But WordPress runs on Stripe. BandCamp runs through Stripe. I’m just gonna work on moving SmutBag to Stripe, and then continuously look out for some banking option that doesn’t make me want to vomit.

SmutMag Radio is on temporary hiatus.

You may have noticed SmutMag isn’t live anymore. That’s not because it’s over. It’s because I didn’t pay my bill. And why didn’t I pay my bill? Because I looked at my calendar of the month ahead and said, “I don’t have any new programming for this and I need that fifty bucks elsewhere.” So I let it lapse until I have money or programming. I mean, I love my playlist, and would love for it to keep playing for people until I get more content, but I’m not paying enough attention to it at this moment, anyway, and…if something’s got to give. Well.

Besides. I’m thinking I may make it a little less porny. Basically, I needed content to get started, and I had a ton of Marla content. And don’t get me wrong, I want to include some of that. I just don’t know if it’s gonna be all jerking off all night long. Some of it might be talking about jacking off. I’d like to be a little more intentional with the programming, I’m trying to say.

Also, I really want to work with other erotica artists. And now that I’ve fucked around with it a good bit, I’d like to restart it with something big. Not putz around while I neglect it and tend to other things. So it’s on hiatus.

However, if you love the playlist and miss it, you can bring it back to life by subscribing. If I’m no longer desperate for fifty bucks here and there, I don’t have to ever turn it off. So subscribe. It keeps things cooking.

The “Home” Project.

Look, I’ll update you guys about this soon. Basically, I made a video update, and I hated it, and so I said I would redo it, but then I didn’t have time. All is good, there is no breaking news, except the siding is going up this week. Whoo! But…I want to give you guys a proper update on that. Later. But the cats and I are good.

The Pornification of YouTube. The Pornocalypse for pornographers.

I have…a lot to say on this subject. And I will say it later. But for now, I’ll say, my want to say things on this subject stems from the horrifying ads that are now on my YouTube feed. The other day, I was going on what I guess started as an HBO spiral:

West Wing Scene.

West Wing Scene.

Wire Scene.

Sex and the City Scene (Miranda buys an apartment).

Sex and the City Scene(girls talking about threesomes)–

But I didn’t get to that sex and the City Scene, because an AI advertisement with a girl talking FILTHY STUFF about the secret to a BIG HARD PENIS was running first, and it was playing as I was doing other stuff, so it played long enough for me to realize that this was straight up porn.

Like, I-Charge-Money-To-Talk-Like-That porn. On what has got to be a pretty mainstream YouTube Spiral.

So, of course, I clicked on the ad.

And yes, it was straight up porn. Just straight up hardcore fucking. While AI “scientists” (hot women) talked about their research, and how they were thinking day and night about the problem of keeping a penis erect.

This commercial had “celebrity endorsements” from the Rock, and Arnold Schwarzenegger. Arnold claimed “the honey secret” enabled him to have sex with his wife for three hours. The scientists claimed they had the science behind what satisfies a woman.

Every. Single. Thing. About. This Ad. Was. Disgusting.

Juxtapose with this, how many creators are getting demonetized for saying the wrong things. For being too accidentally sexual.

The overlords are absolutely happy with pornography so long as it mindfucks you into profitable aims FOR THEM. For the Advertisers. If it leaves you insecure, stupid and overstimulated, horrified, shocked or traumatized. If the artists involved are being exploited and not respected. That is all to good ends, if you are a tech overlord. But they are virulently against sex in art if leads to joy or love or understanding, or enlightenment, or reaps a profit for the artists involved.

Which is to say, all sex on the internet must be rape now.

There’s a lot to unpack. I made a video in the moment, and I’m making myself not delete it, because I really want to do a more in depth piece on it. But suffice it to say, our culture is an absolute fucking shitshow.

And, of course, the news.

Here’s what I’ll say about the news: Get on Mastadon. Get on DuckDuckGo. Get on PeerTube. Get rid of the mainstream crap. Now is the time. If you want to talk news, you can talk to me on Mastadon.